Lest you Think I'm Shallow

I like to think that deep down, I have little need for or attachment to things. But I also think my deep down is, well, an abyss. Which is just to say that my arms aren't long enough to reach the unmaterialistic part. As such, I'm spending the last part of my Friday making a mental list of all the things I'm craving these days. 1. Queen-size Serta pillowtop mattress. They have them at Sam's for around $500 2. Vespa LX150. In silver, I think. 3. New MacBook. 4. And because I'd like a nice comfy auto with AC the next time I have to evacuate, the Scion xA 5. A nice frame for the artwork my sister-in-law made for us for Christmas Wow! In just five items, I'm in the hole for over $20k! Whole chunks of my day are dedicated to these musings. And I'm well convinced that my quality of life would increase exponentially with each of these purchases. It's got something to do with age, I believe. As a responsible grown up, I'm supposed to have certain luxuries. Like, a car that isn't 15 years old. Or a bedframe. Without them, I haven't quite arrived. You know, at that place you get to when you've figured everything out. I'm picturing a SONIC, America's Drive In. With a parking lot full of Audis. Hey, at least there's french fries.

I got Cute Overload Again

As We've Come to Know and Love it: The Storm

Our friends at the New Orleans Times Pic have put together a very telling animation of just what went down on August 29, 2005. I live here, but I don't think I fully understood the various levee breaches and storm surges and Pontchartrain swells until today. The animation includes a time stamp which makes clear that all was lost by about 9:30AM that Monday morning -- a full day before the federal government acknowledged any levee breaches.

If you made it to the seventh grade...

...then you can probably read and understand my blog, according to Juicy Studio's Readability Test. Of course, according to Lifehacker, you can fool the test with gibberish.

In which we have a couple of days to think about it

Let's start with a little anecdote. For many, many years, little Suzy was a dedicated drinker of Coke, the Real Thing. When she'd been out a wee bit too late the night before, nothing made her feel better than a tall glass over ice. Preferably from the fountain. Or also, from McDonald's, because there's something about that Coke. Who knows what it is, but it's crack-a-licious. In any case, one day little Suzy realized that none of her pants fit anymore, and she that she had to make some changes in her diet. With the specter of a life without Coke -- without fizz so to speak -- looming before her her, she caved and reached for a Diet Coke. It was pretty gross at first, but she drank on. And before long, she was fully converted. Today, regular Coke is dead to her. The moral of the story is that if Suzy can make the switch,just about anyone can. Including the impressionable teens for whom it will be the only option in their vending machines in school. Now, I'm all for Clinton's deal with the soda companies. Eliminating high calorie sodas from vending machines at schools could prove to cut back on childhood obesity, and I'd venture a guess that it won't be bad for ADD, either. But high schools will still sell diet sodas. And, as it turns out, Diet Coke-drinkers are far and away Coke's fastest growing market. Food TV's Unwrapped claims that Diet Coke sells are set to outstrip those of regular soda in the next ten years. It's a bit of business genius, really. Coke continues to teach the world to sing, while simultaneously giving their marketing plan an enormous boost. BTW, asparthame rots your bones. Delish! And for a bit of fun, check out what happens when you dump 13 Mentos in a liter bottle of DC.

Hot Video, Totally Safe for Work

Is anybody else a big enough dork to watch this video and think of the crazy way that President Barlett always puts on his jacket? Just me? That's cool.

Has Morgan Spurlock Died and Gone to Heaven

Bill Clinton and his pals have, somehow or another, strong-armed the soda/pop/Coke industry into agreeing to end (or really, curtail) their distribution to most schools. Companies will still sell water, "cetain juices" and lowfat milk in elementary schools. And high school students will have daily access to diet Coke and "energy drinks". So, it's not a total win, but an impressive step forward nonetheless. via NYTimes

Prairie Home Smarty Pants

I mean that in the best possible way. Maybe it's early onset oldness, but Garrison Keillor's column in Salon today (Writers, Quit Whining) struck a lovely note for me. Of writers and other grownups who love to grouse about the trials of adulthood, Keillor writes:

Young people are pessimistic enough these days without their elders complaining about things. Shut up. Life is pretty good when you grow up. You own your own car, you go where you like, and you sing along with the radio or talk to yourself or chat on your cellphone. You pull into the drive-up window and order the Oreo Blizzard. What's not to like?

It's a simple enough thing, just enjoying the pleasures this world has to offer. It's -- shoot me for saying so --above average.

Poor widdle Scarwett.

I've always wanted to like Scarlett Johanson, but she's really making it hard. Here she is, on May Day, protesting the paparazzi. And spelling "harassed" wrong. Thanks, Perez.